In Conversation With A Fucktard

Here, for your enjoyment, is the verbatim account of a conversation I had today with an irate woman who'd come to see a screening on campus this evening:

Woman: I want you to know that your campus is very hard to find.

Me: Would you like me to move it?

Woman: At night, it's very dark and it's hard to find.

Me: Would it be better if we moved the campus? Shall I have it moved to Highway 111?

Woman: It took me 30 minutes to get here!

Me: Would you like me to see if we can move the campus across the street from your house?

Woman: It shouldn't take me 30 minutes to find this place. 

Me: Where do you live?

Woman: About 30 minutes away. And there isn't proper signage.

Me: Other than the huge sign that says UC-Riverside that stretches the length of the building? And all the signs pointing to the campus?

Woman: I couldn't find it. I had to make a U-turn. I shouldn't have to make a U-turn.

Me: And yet here you are.

Woman: How was I supposed to know which building to go to?

Me: Did you go to any other buildings?

Woman: No.

Me: Then apparently it was made clear.

Woman: Look at this map. This map indicates that the campus is on the other side of the street.

Me: Only if you're looking at it upside down. And ma'am, you're here. You found the place. You followed the directions and here you are, right where you're supposed to be.

Woman: It's very dark out.

Me: It's night. 

Woman: It's very hard to find! 

Me: 

Woman: It's not conveniently located.

Me: You are aware that I didn't build this place, right?