Be The First Person With A Copy Of THE FIX In The Entire World!

A box filled with approximately 8000 copies of The Fix has landed on my doorstep and since I'm all about giving back to the community, I'm thinking that I should give a few away. But since I also like nothing more than a little blood sport, I thought making this into a contest would be more fun than just simply pulling a few names out at random. So, in the spirit of highlighting you, my faithful readers, leave a comment here detailing your secret skill or power (for instance, I can moonwalk...not well, but I can do it...I can also imitate Michael Silverblatt, which, admittedly, I do tremendously well) and at the end of the week, I'll pick the winners.

Remember: I can't pick you as a winner if you use a fake email address.

Update: Polls close tonight, Saturday the 26th, at midnight. Winners will be announced on Sunday.

Comments

[Clair]

I do an astonishingly lifelike imitation of an elephant. I can also flip my eyelids inside out.

Strangely, no one ever asks me to do either of these things.

[Drew]

I have a 87.9% hit rate at guessing which fucktard Tod will pick from any given Sunday's
Parade magazine.

[Terrie]

I can stand on my head and recite the Greek alphabet. Neither of which is particularly impressive in itself, but when done in combination....
I look like an even bigger idiot.

[Eric G]

most bodies can convert cheese to (somewhat) solid form... mine makes it liquid (I really should see a doctor).

[Kristy]

I can talk like a parrot and more importantly I can convince my husband that it was actually "his" idea to install a french door that leads to nowhere.

[Andrew]

i can juggle, train dogs and have risen from a coma after 13 days.

[Jeremy]

I do a mean Warren Olney. And a pretty mean Lorraine Bracco in GOODFELLAS -- "He started to touch me... I told him stop and he wouldn't... Henry..."

[Bill Peschel]

I can read a James Patterson novel and not turn into a drooling idiot (although I don't know if my wife will confirm this).

Also,

[Leslie]

I can make my nose flair out at will. That's good for intimidating children.

[Joe]

I can sing any song in the voice and intonation of Bob Dylan. No one has ever asked me to do this.

[Peter Handel]

i can cook chicken really well and i'm a vegetarian.

[amber]

By the third time I've heard a song, I know 95% of its lyrics... and, I have a habit of getting songs stuck in my head from random conversations.

[jamie]

I remember people's birthdays. Not just family and friends, but casual acquaintances, too. If you tell me your birthday, it's etched into my brain for all of eternity.

Go ahead. Try me.

[Mystery Dawg]

I walk and talk at the same time. Oh, I know, I have 6 kids and still have all my hair and some money in the .....

[Graham]

I can get the last bit of mayonnaise out of the bottom of the jar.

[Elaine]

I can identify and draw every national flag in the world.

And, I can touch my toes, too!

[Jane]

I speak seven different languages, and am proficient at volleyball, basketball, softball and modern dance. I play several different instruments, learn music by ear, and have perfect pitch and a seven octave range. I am a licensed pilot, and have also driven in NASCAR. I can make an explosive out of a rubber band and toothpaste. I ghostwrote the Anarchist's Cookbook and Will Durant's History of the World. I get laid by beautiful people several times a week.

Bond. Jane Bond.

[Damian Colucci]

I used deception towards a internet operator of ExtremeMusic.com, a production music company, to trick her into getting me a password for the site; so I could get you guys the "Heavy Leather" song from the Season 1 finale song; the very same song everyone's been looking for 9 months.

http://www.zshare.net/audio/15088753f61570e8/

Thank you very much.

[kryme_dog]

I can stay up all night and score 40 and after the game pull your shorty.

[Kevin]

Not sure it's much of a skill, but..

You know how we're all supposed to be gob-smackingly impressed every time on Lost when John Locke predicts that rain will fall in less than thirty seconds, and he's always accurate?

That's what I do, with less lead time. I could be with a large group of people, and still call attention to the rain they won't notice for another fifteen seconds.

Why? Because the first drop always lands on me.

[Daniel]

I can drink two 40s of Miller High Life while eating s'mores and not wake up with a hangover the next day.

[Tanya]

Not to encroach on another person's skill, but I DO know and remember your birthday every year. It's not so difficult to remember that you're 5 1/2 months older than me! :)

But my own special skill is to say magical spells on my friends named Tod (admittedly a small list) to choose me to receive a free book. We'll have to see if the spell works. :)

[bunny]

MY special skill would be the power to win this book! :) Woohoo!!

[Peter]

I love Burn Notice and I love to read. My secret power is having a wild imagination. I've plot so many ways to make sure that I will be the winner. Mwa ha ha.

[Anea]

I can produce photos of Tod when he played soccer (I have the playing card somewhere - no I am not a stalker, I'm a cousin) and even more of him with 80's hair...
I do enjoy burn notice and also like it when I dont' have to pay for family members books ;).
Maybe my super-power is thrifty-ness :)
Anea