I know I've asked this question before, but I'm not absolutely certain its ever been answered to my satisfaction, so let me pose it one more fucking time:
What the fuck is wrong with you people?
I mean, seriously, what the fuck is up?
Now, let me be clear, I don't mean you people, as in the people who actually read this blog, who are obviously very intelligent, worldly, hip and unlikely to see Delta Farce any time in the near future, unless forced to by the conditions of your parole. No, I mean the rest of you people, the ones who stumble upon this blog searching for your own name, only to find that I've taken you to task for your feral blood lust for the taste of fetid human flesh.
I can only presume from the number of letters Parade prints from "people" wondering where various celebrities are buried that there exists a vibrant underground network of necrophiliacs who gather most of their information on the mortality of celebrities and then the disposition of their corpses, by submitting questions to Walter Scott's Personality Parade, content to patiently wait for their marrow-sucking-corpse-bukkake desires to be satiated until such time that the upper right hand corner of Sunday's Personality Parade gives them a road map to pleasure. It's weird. Whenever someone has a question about a dead celebrity, it's always in the upper right hand corner. In fact, I keep waiting for a question to come in to Walter that asks what I think many of these fucktards are thinking: Is it okay that I'd still have sex with Anna Nicole? Walter would then respond that still wanting to have sex with Anna Nicole is perfectly acceptable, and then he'd post up ten reasons why it's okay that Parade readers could vote on. It would look like this:
We think Anna Nicole is still one hot catch, especially now that God is managing her business. We think there are at least 10 good reasons having sex with her is still tasteful -- voters can go to parade.com to vote on which of the following they think is appropriate:10. Her boobs are still soft and warm.9. Now at least she wouldn't feel like she had to talk.8. Now, it would be for love, not money.7. I always thought she was a dirt whore, now it's true.6. Necrophilia is not illegal in California.5. She taught me how to love in SKYSCRAPER. I want to return the favor.4. Dead is a relative term. We are all alive in God's kingdom.3. Dude, did you see how she was dressed? She was begging for it.2. I was trying to break into Johnny Cash's tomb, was already hard, figured what the hell.1. Elton John and I are re-writing "Levon" in her honor and I wasn't sure if she'd wear her war wound like a crown...so I screwed her corpse just to be sure.We'll post the results next week!
Film star Betty Hutton died recently. Where is buried?
The brassy star of 1950's Annie Get Your Gun died March 11th at 86 and is buried at Desert Memorial Park in Palm Springs, Calif. After she left Hollywood in 1957, Hutton turned to alcohol and pills and attempted suicide in 1972. Rehabilitated by a priest while working in a Catholic rectory, she later earned a master's and taught acting. A recluse, "Betty was estranged from her family," a friend tells us. "None of her three daughters went to her funeral."